She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
