i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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