Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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