he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
