i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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