Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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