just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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