I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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