We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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