sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Randomize
