Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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