Who did Billy Mays play for?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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