His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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