Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
The uberlube is also flammable
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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