my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
