Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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