Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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