Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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