There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
