At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize