He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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