I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
