I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize