2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
