Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
