remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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