SEEEEXXX PLEASE
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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