You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize