I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
