How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
