I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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