let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
He did a backflip because drugs
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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