I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Randomize
