You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
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She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
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i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person