I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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