I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
