how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
