Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
