booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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