just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
