no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
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