At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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