i was rollin on her like bob the builder
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
