The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
farters have to be the big spoon...
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
