Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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