There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
