What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
she told me i tasted like america
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
