I want to stick my p in your. b.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
