You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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