they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
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I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
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I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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